The Serenity Prayer

God, grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
Thy will, not mine, be done.
In recovery, there is no tool more useful and effective than The Serenity Prayer. Regardless of whether it’s Alcoholics Anonymous, ALANON, Narcotics Anonymous, [...]

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The Fruits of Bitterness

STEP 6: I abandon my desire to spread malice because of my pain and anger, and I chose to relinquish my right to be self-absorbed.
Having a relationship with God through faith, your Heavenly Father has already provided you with everything you need to facilitate your own recovery. It’s inside you. By faith, you are God’s [...]

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Praying for Patience Doesn’t Work

STEP 2: I refuse to continue living my life pursuing self-defeating behavior.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve prayed for patience—only to become more impatient when I’m finished. My anxiety level actually increases. Praying for patience doesn’t work. At least, my experience is that it doesn’t work. Perhaps such prayers work for some people, [...]

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Spiritual Superiority Causes Religious Abuse: PART 2

Step 4: I chose to accept as true what God says about Himself. He is good and can be trusted. I recognize that God is not the abuser; people who misuse their authority are the abusers.
Believing in his own infallibility, the leader becomes accountable to God only, which means it’s all right to treat others [...]

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Spiritual Superiority Causes Religious Abuse: PART 1

Step 4: I chose to accept as true what God says about Himself. He is good and can be trusted. I recognize that God is not the abuser; people who misuse their authority are the abusers.
In recovery, especially after having experienced religious abuse, we have to view service to others differently. When you take a [...]

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What Is Success, Really?

STEP 11: I make a commitment to nurture my relationship with God, asking Him to reveal His will to me as well as the power to carry it out.
What is the mark of success for a man or woman? Is it fame and fortune, enjoying the good life that typifies the American dream?
In the church [...]

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Walking the Walk

STEP 5: I have to repair my relationship with God and make amends with everyone I have wronged along the way.
One of the primary sources of religious abuse comes from a misunderstanding of The Great Commission. If you ask most Christians what The Great Commission is, they will tell you it is to witness about [...]

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There Are No Bailouts for Christians

STEP 10: I believe that God still has a purpose for my life—a purpose for good and not evil.
As times have become more difficult, Christians are abdicating their responsibility to be “salt and light” to the world more than ever. Believing that the Rapture is imminent, in a twisted way, Christians actually welcome the deterioration [...]

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Being a Failure Is a Necessity

Step 2: I refuse to continue living my life pursuing self-defeating behavior.
Whenever you talk about recovery, whether it’s from alcoholism, spousal abuse, drug addiction, or religious abuse—failure is a prerequisite. Without being a failure, there would be no need for recovery. But failure doesn’t have to be negative—not in the long term. The key isn’t [...]

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The Woeful State of Christianity

STEP 11: I make a commitment to nurture my relationship with God, asking Him to reveal His will to me as well as the power to carry it out.
Many people retreat to God because they don’t want to face challenges; they don’t want to muddle through life’s difficult situations. They want pat answers for everything [...]

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Recovering Character

STEP 3: I accept that the responsibility for getting back on track is mine and no one else’s.
Often lines from a movie make a profound impression on people. In one obscure movie, a man who had badly fallen said, “It’s easier to maintain character than to recover it.”
As a superficial statement, it’s obviously true. It [...]

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Many Have So Little Impact

STEP 2: I refuse to continue living my life pursuing self-defeating behavior.
Christianity is all about a person developing a relationship with Almighty God—a personal, intimate relationship. As such, the literature describing God’s nature and Man’s nature is deep and authentic, especially when it comes to how sinful men related to a holy God. It’s why [...]

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Keep at It—Never Give Up

STEP 2: I refuse to continue living my life pursuing self-defeating behavior.

Adversity is a way of life in recovery—a constant that needs to be recognized and accepted. An easier, softer way just isn’t in the cards. The trick is to look at your life from a growth perspective and not as an end result. You [...]

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Your Despair Has a Purpose

STEP 5: I recognize the only way back to a productive life is exactly the way I came.
When despair comes, recognize it for what it is, but never give in to it. The feeling is normal, but if you nurture it, it will develop into self-pity, which will consistently prevent you from standing on your [...]

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How To Measure Success

Step 10: I believe that God still has a purpose for my life—a purpose for good and not evil.
In our society, success is measured by notoriety, beauty, or the accumulation of wealth. If you’re young, look good, and have lots of money to spend, whether you’ve earned it or not, you are living the American [...]

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