Father,
Unlike most, I know I have it all together.
A person of substance and value.
People listen when I speak,
As words of wisdom roll mellifluously
From the essence of my being.
Indeed, I have it all together.
At least, I believed I did.
Then, You came and shook me,
Knowing my vulnerabilities like no other.
In an instant—in a flash, I was undone.
I was not who I thought I was.
I was not what I claimed to be.
When you revealed me to myself,
I stood naked—laid bare to Your eyes,
Unable to hide from Your scrutiny,
From the truth of who I am.
Broken, embarassed, and unnerved,
I recoiled, consumed with shame and humiliation.
Those who claimed their loyalty abandoned me,
While my enemies delighted at my misfortune.
In an instant, Your blessings seemed to vanish,
And I’ve become fearful they will never return.
Father, when will this nightmare end?
When will it be enough?
When will Your heavy hand of discipline abate,
Restoring me to what I once was?
Will Your pruning be brief or last a lifetime?
You know, and I do not.
Be merciful to me, Father,
For I have learned my lesson,
Regretting my arrogance and self-serving ways.
Hasten the day of my restoration,
Lest my sorrows overwhelm me
And my despair become irreparable.
Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials; knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. (James 1:2-4)
