Refer to Step 10: I believe that God still has a purpose for my life—a purpose for good and not evil.
If a man is going to do anything worthwhile, there are times when he has to risk everything on his leap, and in the spiritual domain, Jesus Christ demands that you risk everything you hold by common sense and leap into what He says, and immediately you do, you find that what He says fits on as solidly as common sense.
Going through an abusive situation is never something a person plans to do. Obviously, it’s an unwanted experience. When it occurs, it’s generally considered to be a detour, an unwanted bump in the road, surprising the abused person.
At the same time, there are no accidents with God. Everything has a purpose, including many unpleasant circumstances, including abuse. If you learn to go with the flow—to believe God still loves you and has a constructive plan for your life—you are definitely on the right track.
It’s normal to go through a myriad of emotions after abuse, including the stages of grief, but when the process is complete, you must come to the place where you are willing to risk everything again. You must trust that God still has you in the palm of His Hand and nothing can separate you from His love and purpose. This doesn’t mean you have to return to an abusive situation, but it does mean you have to be willing to take another leap of faith, depending on God as you do.
God is committed to developing your character, making you into everything He intended for you to be. His goal is for you to be rich in character qualities such as love, joy, peace, patience, and kindness. This is always His goal, never for anything less. Knowing God is with you and for you, regardless of the circumstance, makes trusting Him your wisest option, even after a spouse or a trusted religious leader has been abusive.
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? (Romans 8:31-31)