When I was first subjected to religious abuse, I was hurt, angry, and confused. My life became purposeless for a long time. When I realized that wallowing in self pity wasn’t making things better, I knew I needed to make some changes. I would never become the person I was created to be by nurturing bitterness, and nobody was going to help me. I had to help myself.
That’s when I stopped my downward slide and started working to recover what I had lost. Realizing God was not the problem but the solution, I looked to Him, and the words He spoke, as my source of courage and inspiration. I looked to God for hope—for a way out of my emotional pit. I had to rethink nearly every aspect of my life, changing practically everything. At first, I was overwhelmed by the daunting task before me, resenting all that needed to be done but, after a while, I chose to embrace it instead.
When I was much younger, I had a vision for what my life would be—a vision which was quite grandiose, but God’s purpose was different. Becoming who He wanted me to be has taken substantial work, and it continues to take regular work. By looking to God for the future, rather than blaming Him for the past, I chose life over the debilitating half-life of bitterness.
I worked out a new purpose for my life—a more realistic one. Now that I’ve lived it for many years, I can’t imagine I was created for anything else. My life is filled with the peace and contentment I always desired but was never able to achieve.